Yoga Teacher Training: Day 3
Today I slept. I mean really slept; slept like I was a bear in a cave. I fell asleep at 9.45pm, woke up one time to the thunder (seems to be a common thing this month) and then again at 4.30 for the Muslim prayer. Instead of waking up fully as I normally do, I put the other pillow on top of my head and went deeply into peaceful sleep for the next hour. I awoke to my roommate breaking her morning silence (thank goodness!) to tell me we had our morning practice in 5 minutes. Oh my! Well, it seems as though I’m sleeping pretty well here and that my body must desperately need this sleep. Something that I’ve come to realize is that we are all overstimulated in our lives, which can hinder our sleep, keep us feeling groggy the whole next day, and constantly needing a coffee. We live and breath our phones, the TV, internet, social media, and everything in between. We are bombarded with ads telling us that we need to buy this and that, that we won’t be happy until we have the newest product that will make us more energetic, lose weight, and all the likes in between. There is something really amazing (and yet totally hard) to put your phone away for more than a few hours. I’ve decided to put my phone away for one week, however I haven’t been able to yet because of some last minute work stuff. I’m keeping the usage to a minimum though, and maybe not having it right before I sleep (no tv, no phone, no stimulation of sorts) is helping me to sleep so well!
Anyways, cut to our morning session after my frantic morning of getting ready, which normally starts with a peaceful meditation. Not this time. We begin with light yoga poses and chanting OM, then onto our advanced poses. Everything during the morning session is about correct timing of breath with movement, correct posture and learning to flow in a routine. We are coming to a point where most poses are being called in their Sanskrit name, which I don’t know all yet. (Word is going around that we have to teach a class solely by using the Sanskrit names and anatomy positions of the body…oh gosh, that sounds uber scary…better get studying!). Anyways, the flow is especially tough today. I don’t know if it’s because my mind hasn’t had a chance to wake up, or if it’s that my body is too sore (it really is!!), or I’m just not feeling it this morning. Either way, my mind will absolutely not focus. I mean, at all. I’m doing the breath, the movement, but I’m somewhere else. I’m thinking about writing my blog, my bf, how many days we have left… I catch a glimpse at the clock, it’s 7:13am. Aughhhh! Still 1.5 hours. Anyways I continue the practice, make it through and finally it’s time for breakfast, yay!
One thing I’m noticing is that when you are left on your own, without distraction from life, your mind tries to keep you busy. It wants to over analyze everything, comprehend all that went right and wrong, and keep you busy. I’m beginning to appreciate not speaking to anyone in the morning and being kept in peace, especially during our whole practice as it lets me focus on my breathing and movement, rather than letting my mind take over. The morning silence is something I hope to continue!
We are now on day 3. I feel like I’ve been here a week, which is a bizarre feeling. It’s strange to think about how the rest of the world is turning, people going to work, coming home, going to the gym, a drink or making dinner. As humans, we love routine and structure; when we lose it we can feel lost or out of control. I know for myself, back in LA I don’t have enough of a routine. Here, I’m sleeping better than I have in nine years. My body and mind is exhausted, and yet I feel fulfilled.
I’m also learning so much about our ego, happiness, fear, pushing through mental limits and being content. This has taken me from a world where I live a privileged life to one of bare necessities. I love nice things. I have a Mercedes, Prada purses, Alaia dresses, I love going to nice dinners and ordering good wines. At the same time I could let all these go and be just as happy (if not more) in a life like this. I am now living a life where our toilet and shower are pretty much outside, my hair is frizzy and always kept up, I’m wearing no makeup and yet I’m content. Of course, I’m missing a nice hot shower (only cold water here), clean fingernails, looking pretty, but really, does any of that matter in the quest of happiness?
I have no idea how the rest of the training will go, but I have quite a feeling that it’s going to test every mental and physical limit that I have.
That’s all for now. With Love, N